Duck, (Duck), Goose

Growing up, my brother Frank and I had our share of pets: turtles, dogs, and eventually cats. Then there were the pigeons, the wild animals of the inner city.  One weekend Uncle Johnny and Aunt Ginny took us and our cousin Anthony to the Franklin Park zoo. We piled into the back of the Chevy station wagon excited at the thought of seeing “other” kinds of animals.

As we wondered through the zoo, we took note of the sights, sounds and smells that made up the animal kingdom – at least the one chosen by the zookeepers. We came across a penned in area where parents and children were feeding ducks zoo food pellets. Doreen being Doreen, I zipped ahead of the others because all animals needed to be patted. Well, that’s what we did with the dogs and cats, right?

I reached the pen and stuck my little hand over the one-foot high fence and attempted to “pat” the nearest duck. Of course, the duck thought I had food so bit my plump 8-year old palm! I screamed to high heaven and ran off in the opposite direction as fast as my little legs would carry me leaving the adults fearing for their lives if they returned home to grandma without me.

I don’t remember how I was recaptured but am afraid to ask even now. I can still get yelled at even though I’m a grown up.

Twenty years after the duck attack, my boyfriend and I were strolling through Illinois’ Morton Arboretum. It reminded me of the episode so I told Ron all about it as we approached the edge of a pond (left) where, similar to the zoo incident, parents and children were feeding geese. At the exact moment that I finished telling him about my childhood trauma, the families ran out of bread. The flock of geese saw Ron and me and ran/flew at us for dear life.

I nearly had a heart attack thinking that the Boston duck had passed the word through generations of avian fowl to the Illinois geese and this was the satisfaction of their long-held revenge against me for trying to pat them. It was all I could do to compose myself while Ron, laughing his head off, said “you should see your face!” See my face? I was ready to meet my Maker. Never mind the look on my face.

Duck and goose two. Doreen zero.

           (See also the post about “Doreen vs the Squirrel”)